Problems

Problems.
No doubt everyone has them. It’s just a matter of how to solve it, or what nots. But it’s never easy.

#1: Family
No one has a perfect family, no matter how perfect it seems, there’s bound to be something somewhere. Well, at least for me. Some people get depressed because well, their parents set too high an expectation of their child. They would always feel as if their child can do better, even though the child gave their all. But of course, they say it’s for our own good, it will lead to a better future, but you know what, screw it. What we need is not good grades or scholarship, we need support and trust you know? We can’t put in our all if we feel that our best will never satisfy you. What’s the point? Care and concern, thats all we need and ask for, is it so difficult?

#2: School
People. Judgemental? You can avoid it. Especially in school. Like they say, if your fat, your judged. Too thin, judged. Get good grades, judged. Popular, judged. Normal student, judged. You can’t avoid other peoples eyes to land on you and not make a comment. Trust me. When I was like what, elementary school? I was kinda chubby, wasn’t exactly the size I am now, but hellloooo my age was like single digit then. Teacher had asked me to collect work from my row, there was this guy, who i clearly remember the name, calling me ‘fat’ and ‘ pig’. Trust me to be damn freaking shocked. Never in my life (for that few years) i had been called like that. It impacted me ALOT. Cause it’s like my first time, and you know, your first time in stuff normally impacts you the most. Yup, then, i lost some weight, at least i tried. Then, i gave up, cause i thought, why should i change just because someone called me names? But then, when i entered middle school, after joining sports clubs, and camps, i lost some weight naturally. But hey, no matter what you do, people will talk about you. You can either enjoy the attention, or cry other rejection.

#3: Friends?

What are true friends? People who will support you all the way, no matter what your choices are. I, certainly had my spill of it. Well, i evolved? And guess what, karma is really gets you back. When i was in like, erm, playschool? Well, around like kindergarten age, i vaguely remember being bossy like shit. I can’t REALLY remember what happened but i think i asked my then best friend to maybe perhaps not be friends with some other girl.. heh… But then, in middle school, my best friend, or so called best friend, well, gave me a taste of my own medicine. I befriended another girl, who she then asked me to stay away or else she’ll you know, break the friendship. … Let’s just say i was a bit, tiny, little, stubborn, and continued to be friends with the other. Who knew, she really did ignore me. It’s complicated shit people. Then, i can’t remember what happened (getting old…) she became great pals with the other and left me alone. GOSH. I’m not kidding. They still talked to me, we still went together and all stuff crap, but for partners for projects or trips they would partner up themselves, and well, leave me stranded to find another. Betrayal? I don’t know. Heh… We don’t you know, really know it each other since you know, high school happened…

YUP. This world is a hell of complications. It’s definitely easy to say ignore what they say about us, but it’s hard to really do so. We can’t stop people from judging us, cause judging has no limits. We can only you know, either silently weep, or stand proud. Proud of who we are. We don’t have to change for others, if we want to change, it’s up to us. And like they say, a person don’t change, they just become more of what they really are. 🙂

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